Nakago's big adventure!
by The Holy Beergut
Summary: Nakago gets transported to modern Japan by a fanfiction author and soon finds himself being the controlled and not the controller.
1. The start of the insanity

Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi. (And I don't want to.)  
  
(We're in the kingdom of Seiryuu where Nakago is in his private chambers happily squeezing cute little sparrows to death.)  
  
Cute little sparrow: CHIR...ack!  
  
Nakogo: Tra la la la la, I am very evil.  
  
( Suddenly a portal opens up in front of him.)  
  
Nakago: What in the name of....*Whoosh!* ( Gets suck into portal.)  
  
(After a bumpy ride the portal spits him out in an umfamiler area.)  
  
Nakago: Ouch! Damn...what the hell was that? (looks around.) Where am I?  
  
???: You're in modern day Japan.  
  
Nakago: Modern day Jap...waitaminute! Who was that? Show yourselves!  
  
???: Alas I have no true physical form, but I belong to the species of race known as fanfiction authors.  
  
Nakago: Fan.fiction...authors?  
  
???: Yes, more specifically, I am the one known as The Holy Beergut , and right now you belong to me.  
  
Nakago: WHAT! How dare you think that you're in charge of the great Nakago!(tries to charge his powers but is unable to do so.) Huh?  
  
THB: Told ya, see? I just took away your powers.  
  
Nakago: How did you do that? And more importantly, return them to me!  
  
THB: Well, to answer your second question, NO. And you should know that we fanfic authors are almighty as long as we put a disclaimer first.  
  
Nakago: A disclaimer?  
  
THB: Yes well but enough about that. Anyway like I said, you're in modern day Japan, and I have put you here as a sort of...trial for you and you'll soon find that it is very different from your former world.  
  
Nakago: ( head vein throbbing.) And pray tell, what is your motive and what will you gain from all this insanity?  
  
THB: ........I never really thought of that, shits and giggles I suppose.  
  
Nakago: ........( throbbing head vein has grown visibly larger.)  
  
THB: Well I've taken up too much of your time. I'll contact you again, good bye and good luck! (voice fades away.)  
  
Nakago: Wait! I have more I need to ask of you. Damn! Now what the heck am I suppose to d.....  
  
???: Excuse me?  
  
(Nakago turns around and notices a young teenage girl looking at him.)  
  
Girl: Dude that is one funky outfit, where'd you come from? A cosplay?  
  
Nakago: Huh? (looks at his clothes, he was wearing his usual blue Generals outfit.) And what is wrong with it may I ask?  
  
Girl: It's weird dude, but still it's very detailed. ( stares some more.) Actually you kind of look like that evil guy from Fushigi Yuugi, whatzitsname? Nokoga?  
  
Nakago: It's Nakago! And that's because I'm....  
  
(suddenly time freezes.)  
  
Nakago: What the?  
  
THB: Hey, it's me again.  
  
Nakago: You! What do you want now? Haven't you tormented me enough by stripping me of my powers and sending me to this cursed place?  
  
THB: To be honest, no. Since I own you for now, I'm going to make full use of it. Right now you have to say what I want you to say.  
  
Nakago: You can't do tha....I LIKE FLUFFY BUNNIES! (clamps a hand over his mouth.)  
  
THB: See? I have FULL control over you, but since I'm such a kind person, I'm going to give you two choices on what to say to that girl.  
  
Nakago: Two?  
  
THB: Yes, two.  
  
Nakago: Just two?  
  
THB: Yes well here they are! (a screen appears.)  
  
I AM NAKAGO MOON! CHAMPION OF LOVE AND JUSTICE!---choice #1  
  
I am a horny sex starved maniac, take me now!---choice #2  
  
Nakago: .......anymore?  
  
THB: No.  
  
Nakago: Damn you.  
  
What will Nakago say? Find out in the next chapter! Read and review please! 


	2. The birth of a senshi

Disclaimer: I don't own FY. (can you spot the tribute to GTA:vice city?)  
  
(Continuing where we left off, Nakago is still staring at the screen, Rendered dumb by his choices.)  
  
THB: Come on! I haven't got all day, I have stories to write, Fics to read, people to flame. Chop! Chop! Chop!  
  
Nakago: What do you expect me to do? This is a hard decision to make.  
  
THB: What's so difficult about it? Just pick, #1 or 2. Now hurry up! Or I'll make you say something even worse then this. And trust me, I can do that.  
  
Nakago: ............fine! (picks choice #1)  
  
( Time starts again)  
  
Nakago: I AM NAKAGO MOON! CHAMPION OF LOVE AND JUSTICE!  
  
Girl: *backing away s-l-o-w-l-y* Okayyyyyyy.  
  
Nakago: No! Wait! What I really meant was......  
  
(Time freezes and screen appears again.)  
  
I'm actually a gay foreign hitchhiker and since I was dump by my boyfriend, I have been wandering around endlessly with little food, water or articles of clothing. ---Choice #1  
  
Damn I'm horny, TAKE ME NOW! GODDAMNIT! ---Choice #2  
  
IN THE NAME OF LOVE AND JUSTICE I EXPEL YOU EVIL DOERS! ---Choice #3  
  
Nakago: Curse you! (Examines his choices and picks #3.)  
  
(I' m tired of typing time freeze and all that crap so from now on, $ means time freezes and when the screen appears and & means time starts again, so anyway.)  
  
&  
  
Nakago: IN THE NAME OF LOVE AND JUSTICE I EXPEL YOU EVIL DOERS!  
  
Girl: (Runs away screaming.)  
  
Nakago: Great I scared her off, (picks up her backpack, and checks inside.) These things could be handle while I'm here. (Slings bag over his shoulders.)  
  
Did I mention that the bag is hot pink in color and has powerpuff girls all over it? Well I should.  
  
Yes I know, I'm evil. *Cackle! * *Cackle! *  
  
$  
  
THB: Yo, I see you made some progress in this world.  
  
Nakago: Foul beast! Have you not tortured me enough? What do you what now?  
  
THB: Watch your language asshole, actually I've come to help you, here. (A piece of paper appears in Nakago's hand.)  
  
Nakago: What's this?  
  
THB: That's the address to your supposedly reincarnated self, so if you're lucky, he'll help you out.  
  
Nakago: I get reincarnated?  
  
THB: Yeah, well I said too much already, good luck!  
  
&  
  
Nakago: (Stares at the paper.) Where the heck is this place?  
  
???: There he is! That's the guy who tried to attack me!  
  
(Nakago turns around and sees the same girl only 4 large primitive males were now with her.)  
  
Girl: Look! He even stole my backpack Brother!  
  
Man: Hey punk! How dare you try to hurt my little sister, you cross- dressing shit!  
  
Nakago: *sigh* First of all, my name isn't PUNK, it's...  
  
$  
  
Lucy---Choice#1  
  
Stacie---Choice#2  
  
Geri---choice#3  
  
Nakago moon---choice#4  
  
Nakago: This sucks. (Picks #4)  
  
&  
  
Nakago: Nakago Moon!  
  
Everybody: .......(Staring strangely at him.)  
  
Nakago: Second of all.....  
  
$  
  
Man, I soooo need to get laid right now. Any of you big boys up to it? --- Choice #1  
  
I'm a little teapot, short and stout! This is my handle this is my spout! La! La! La! La!--- Choice#2  
  
DICKS! YOU'RE ALL DICKS! --- choice#3  
  
Nakago:....Number 3 doesn't seem so bad. (Picks #3)  
  
&  
  
Nakago: DICKS! YOU'RE ALL DICKS!  
  
(Hearing this, the four men started to approach the blond-haired man slowly, an angry (understatement) look in their eyes.)  
  
Nakago: Stay back! Stay back! (Tries to charge up an energy ball but to no avail.) Damn I forgot.  
  
Seeing 4 big men, fists clench walking towards him. Nakago decided to do the most dignified thing to do to get out of this situation with life and pride still intact.  
  
He ran away screaming like a little girl, pink powerpuff girls bag still slung on his shoulders.  
  
And somewhere in another world, a certain fanfic author is grinning like a maniac as he watches the seiryuu commander running away from several big males bearing down on him.  
  
THB: The worst is yet to come Nakago, the worst is yet to come.....  
  
Dang, I'm so freaky sometimes I scare myself. Please read and review. ( Oh, and I have nothing against sailor moon, I just think their lines are corny.) 


End file.
